Five weeks out….

So, the next all company email has gone out – may get more than a single response this time…

Dear all,

Over the course of my life I have lapsed at many things.

Certainly the original idea of not drinking, smoking and whatever the dietary element was has lapsed, and then some…

My religion has lapsed – in fact I lost that before REM, so that is ancient history.

But, because I relish a challenge – and to be honest, a big f*cking hill in the Atlas on a Brompton doesn’t really cut it – I have professionally lapsed this time…

… or, as a little bit of advertising agency has rubbed off on me, despite my age and the fact I listen to the home service on the wireless, I like to shorten this to ‘pro-lapsed’…

…in fact one can narrow this down to my L5 lumber disc or somesuch thing which, pictorially, is the broken man’s equivalent of sharing scans of unborn children on Facebook…

The bright side of a walking stick on a Brompton is that, if your mind can make the leap beyond ‘complete cock’, it is a bit like a knight on his charger, spear in hand, change my name to ‘George’ (and become shit hot at PR…)

Regardless I am going to do this*, it is a great cause, you have just been paid and can help:

Since my last mail I have rather painfully done the following by way of a spot of practice

  •   336 miles
  •   17.5k’ of climbing
  •   Looked after 2 kids
  •   Held down a full time job
  •   Balance out the uppers and downers…

Tuffs x


Eeeeeeek five weeks to go


As we approach the end of March, hello Spring, it’s time to reflect.  This time last year, Tuffcall were cycling up and done Box Hill in the sleeting snow.  This year, training shifted to Poland and I found myself in a micro brewery carb loading.

Falling into the vat of lager was a genuine accident and not at all planned. Suffice to say there were limited opportunities in Poland to up the mileage.

 photo 3

I feel in no way prepared for the event and the usual doubt is starting to creep in.


Strava has been hacked

I checked my strava page and discovered that I have climbed 28,000 feet this month – An excellent effort if I say so myself.

However, I think 23,000 of those were aboard a plane to Poland!!!

photo 1


Time to extract the cash


Eight weeks out

Okay – that’s it, I have sent the company-wide sponsorship mail – let the world know I am doing this and commited to getting healthy – that was the easy bit!

All R/GA:

For those who missed my inaugural Toastmasters talk yesterday, between all the ‘effing and blinding’ and giving HR enough material to extradite me from the building, I touched on uppers and downers!

The big high in this case being the Oukaimeden in the High Atlas – a casual 10,000’ of climbing on my little Brompton! The downer being the return journey which is terrifying – last year the clown bike topped 50mph!

Starting in Marrakech, you climb through the High Atlas Mountains to the ski resort of Oukaïmeden (Ouka) at 2624m, an altitude gain of some 2129m in aid of Education for All. To give you an idea The Ouka Monster is bigger in altitude gain than any of the classic climbs in the Tour de France:

Oukaïmeden 2129m
▲ Galibier 1924m
Mont Ventoux 1622m
▲ Tourmalet 1404m
▲ Alpe d’Huez 1071m

I am about to go through the pain of spending the next 8 weeks getting fit, not smoking, not drinking beer and not eating junk food to do this. In return I want to rob you all deaf, dumb and blind in the name of a fantastic cause (I cover all my expenses and all monies go to the charity)

Thanks in advance,

Tuffs x


A while back I sent out a rallying call to everyone I know to see if they wanted to join us – other than the odd person being recommended by others, so far, the response is ‘minimal’ but it is not too late to join! – We are flying Saturday 26 April – riding Sunday 27 April – returning Monday 28 if you have the urge.

And for something completely different which may need the addition of an AK: